Maggots devour me
Clenched teeth rotting
Pendulums oscillating
Ribcage melting, censored presenting
White blinds
Singing as pastime
All eyes watching, but never seeing
Imploding like clockwork, ten times daily
What is the use of my tongue
my heart, my head, my hands
Dried-eyeliner tears
Commute fears
Distanced time
Always falling behind
Daydreams that mock
Nightmares that call me home
Breathing through the nose so this doesn't hit home
Grasping on too tightly but never tight enough
Forced perspective and fingernail etches
Always stagnant, still, stuck
Stupefied into oblivion
Curses on my lips and sob stories in my eyes
Blink — and the pity resurfaces
Longing to hurt, to maim, stick my hands in your bones and in your lungs
Longing to hear your laughter, louder, lasting longer in loops, strangling you
Little by little, I'm scrunching my toes, my skin, my being — so I never see me again
Repeating everyday: there is only so many days I can take.
Repeating everyday: this is my house too. Please remember, this is my home too.
